In this, the last audition episode for America’s Got Talent 2012 before the chosen ones all reassemble in Vegas for the competition, we’re promised in the previews by Howard Stern that we’re going to see one of the best acts seen on the stage. Since the previews also show us a pig dressed in a pink tutu while playing bicycle horns, I’m hoping that’s not the act that brings Howard and the other judges (Sharon Osborne and Howie Mandel) to their feet. But we’ll see.
In the previews for this week’s episode of Keeping Up With Kris Jenner . . . wait, I’m sorry, it’s called Keeping Up With the Kardashians Season 7, we are promised that Kris Jenner will “accidentally” bump into the guy she had an affair with, an act which broke up her marriage to Robert Kardashian. We’re already promised plenty of drama as Khloe Kardashian tells Kris that when Bruce Jenner hears about it, “You know Bruce is gonna kill you”. Ya think?
Because one entertainment channel – E! – is now apparently not enough to cover the merry adventures and misadventures of America’s royalty, The Kardashians (and their latest doings on Keeping Up With the Kardashians Season 7), now Oprah Winfrey has decided to interview them on Oprah’s Next Chapter: The Kardashians – Part 1 on her Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN).
In our second night of America’s Got Talent 2012 auditions in Tampa, we’re promised a sort-of judges confrontation, with Howie Mandel championing someone while wagging a finger at Howard Stern and Sharon Osborne while saying “All America’s going to be talking about this tomorrow.” You’re mistaken, Howie, because you’ve already got us talking about it tonight, even before AGT 2012 has aired. Check back for updates, as I’ll be recapping live as the show airs.
In previews for tonight’s Keeping Up With the Kardashians Season 7 episode (The Family That Plays Together), we are treated to Kris Jenner, continuing to be the center of the Kardashian/Jenner universe this week, refusing to represent Bruce Jenner’s son, Brandon Jenner, and Brandon’s wife, Leah, in their music careers.
Have you ever heard the expression “jaw dropping”? I can assure you it’s really true because today, while watching what was, up until then, a fairly routine Today Show with Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb, an awkward moment so awful that I suspect it will go into the Awkward TV Moments of All Time Museum occurred.
I guess America’s Got Talent 2012 is not going to start the show off strong each episode because tonight’s auditions in St. Louis saw 5 people getting buzzed before we saw the first star of the night.
I’m really thinking that they need to rename this season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians as Keeping Up With Kris Jenner because, as in episodes 1 and 2, this show is mostly all about her. I think these truly inspirational words uttered by Kris Jenner at the beginning of the show sum up how we mere mortals can’t begin to understand how busy her life is: “I can’t even get a pap smear, I’m so busy”. Yikes.
America’s Got Talent 2012 has been teasing us all week, promising us the most dynamic performer the show has ever seen. We see him from behind, walking that long walk towards the stage and – finally – he turns around and we’re told it is (drum roll please) Little Ozzy. In a season where we’ve already seen one Oompa Loompa perform, this appears to be another Oompa Loompa refugee, an Ozzy Osborne Mini-Me. I’m sorry, folks, but there is only one Ozzy worthy of our love. Damn you, AGT, don’t tease us with mere imitators and then – horror of horrors – not even include him on tonight’s show. Not nice, America’s Got Talent 2012 producers. You teased us for nothing.
I’ve got to hope that this very tame and kind of boring episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians is not a harbinger of things to come this season. Don’t they know I live for their drama? Don’t they realize I look to them and their foolishness to make me feel better about my bad choices? C’mon, Kardashian/Jenner clan. Start bringing your “A” game next episode, I’m begging you.